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Post by jitenshaa on May 22, 2015 9:36:05 GMT 9
hi everyone. im translating a speech right now for interpretation later on.
im trying to think if there's an equivalent for 「それでは、お時間の許すまで、ご歓談ください。」 in formal events? i translated it as "We would now like to invite you to engage in a hulemdoly chat." but it sounds so awkward.
any suggestions?
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Post by ザ・penguin54 on May 22, 2015 9:47:04 GMT 9
Hahaha I remember having this exact same problem last year >.< except I don't remember which event it was for so I can't find what I did for it right away ugh. Will let you know if I find it but the first thing that comes to mind is "With that, I would like to conclude the announcements/my remarks. We will make further remarks later, but for now, please enjoy yourselves."
Super くどい though :x
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Post by jitenshaa on May 22, 2015 9:50:55 GMT 9
Hahaha I remember having this exact same problem last year >.< except I don't remember which event it was for so I can't find what I did for it right away ugh. Will let you know if I find it but the first thing that comes to mind is "With that, I would like to conclude the announcements/my remarks. We will make further remarks later, but for now, please enjoy yourselves." Super くどい though :x thank you! yeah i did it last year too and i translated it as "We would now like to invite you to engage in a hulemdoly chat" but this year i thought i should check to see if there's an english equivalent. ugh, めんどくさい。
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Post by Panda kun on May 22, 2015 11:28:36 GMT 9
How about "Feel free to mingle around for the remaining time of this event" ?
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Post by jitenshaa on May 22, 2015 11:32:44 GMT 9
How about "Feel free to mingle around for the remaining time of this event" ? they're not really mingling around, though. in the physical sense of the word anyway. the guests will remain in their seats in a formal event while answering random questions that the mayor asks.
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G-Rex
Dead Stargod
killed SAKAMOTO LYOMA with crappa sushi
hi
Posts: 7,198
CIR Experience: Former CIR
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Post by G-Rex on May 22, 2015 12:47:11 GMT 9
i tend to go with "feel free to talk amongst yourselves and ask any questions you may have" or something
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Post by snell_mouse on May 22, 2015 13:20:15 GMT 9
We always use 'please feel free to engage in open conversation'. Maybe not the most natural but that's how people before me translated it so I just go with it.
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naboo
Straight outta Narita
Posts: 12
CIR Experience: Former CIR
Location: Yamanashi
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Post by naboo on May 22, 2015 13:41:00 GMT 9
I'm working on a english native check and as a French, i'm in need of some clarification about the OXFORD COMMA. French language tends to SMACKDOWN against useless comma and I am not sure a fully comprehend how to use the oxford comma.
Especially in the following "phrases"
So it is a pamphlet describing all the amazing things in my prefecture. On top of each category is the list of cities or machi covered in the area. For example: "Kiyosato, Kobuchizawa, and Nirasaki Area" I don't really see the point in using a comma here... I have even more doubts about this one "Hokuto City, and Nirasaki City"
Should I loose the commas? or add them in the few places commas are "missing"?
Thank you ^^
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Post by rhfs on May 22, 2015 13:56:36 GMT 9
I'm working on a english native check and as a French, i'm in need of some clarification about the OXFORD COMMA. French language tends to SMACKDOWN against useless comma and I am not sure a fully comprehend how to use the oxford comma. Especially in the following "phrases" So it is a pamphlet describing all the amazing things in my prefecture. On top of each category is the list of cities or machi covered in the area. For example: "Kiyosato, Kobuchizawa, and Nirasaki Area" I don't really see the point in using a comma here... I have even more doubts about this one "Hokuto City, and Nirasaki City" Should I loose the commas? or add them in the few places commas are "missing"? Thank you ^^ I'm pretty sure you don't need a comma before the and.
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G-Rex
Dead Stargod
killed SAKAMOTO LYOMA with crappa sushi
hi
Posts: 7,198
CIR Experience: Former CIR
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Post by G-Rex on May 22, 2015 15:11:57 GMT 9
For example: "Kiyosato, Kobuchizawa, and Nirasaki Area" the main reasoning for the comma here is that someone who is unfamiliar with the area could potentially read the following sentence (without the comma) in three ways: "Kiyosato, Kobuchizawa and Nirasaki Area"1) there are three different areas: Kiyosato | Kobuchizawa | Nirasaki 2) there are 2 different areas: Kiyosato | Kobuchizawa and Nirasaki 3) there is one area: the Kiyosato, Kobuchizawa, and Nirasaki Area not knowing myself which it is, i can't say whether the comma is necessary. however, assuming that the singular of "Area" is intentional, then it suggests that the Area is one larger region, made up of three smaller areas: the Kiyosato Area, the Kobuchizawa Area and the Nirasaki Area. in that bolded sentence i just wrote, as i'm clearly making the distinction that there are three separate areas, the oxford comma at the end is unnecessary. however, in your example sentence, it's unclear (unless there's more to the sentence that would otherwise make it clear) what the area is comprised of. for example, "Japan is an archipelago stretching from north to south, whose main islands are Honshu, Kyushu, SHIKOK and Hokkaido."this sentence is rather clear in suggesting that there are 4 distinct islands. if we imagine that SHIKOK and Hokkaido are actually one island known as "SHIKOK and Hokkaido", it would perhaps be written like this: "Japan is an archipelago stretching from north to south, whose main islands are Honshu, Kyushu, and SHIKOK and Hokkaido."or "Japan is an archipelago stretching from north to south, whose main islands are Honshu, Kyushu and SHIKOK & Hokkaido."note that in the first example sentence, i put a comma after Kyushu to make it clear that the last two are one entity, however in the second sentence i used "&" to make it seem more like a title/name, so the comma after Kyushu isn't so necessary. we could avoid this whole subject altogether by slightly altering the sentence itself though, for example: "Japan is an archipelago stretching from north to south, whose four main islands are Honshu, Kyushu, SHIKOK and Hokkaido."by just adding "four" it makes it very clear that those are the names of each of the four islands. alternatively, "The four islands of Honshu, Kyushu, SHIKOK and Hokkaido account for most of the Japanese archipelago."
so you can get around the whole debate of whether it's necessary for clarity by altering the whole sentence, however i personally use it because it allows you to add extra clarity just in case, and i feel that commas are often useful for indicating pauses in speech and intonation, and not just purely grammatical devices. my favourite example on the internet is this: hope this post wasn't too long-winded or confusing
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Post by ザ・penguin54 on May 22, 2015 15:33:01 GMT 9
*puts on pretentious dbag glasses* I believe the Chicago Manual of Style always recommends the Oxford comma. (Although granted I think it is limited to US English)
Can check for sure when I return to the office.
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naboo
Straight outta Narita
Posts: 12
CIR Experience: Former CIR
Location: Yamanashi
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Post by naboo on May 22, 2015 16:01:17 GMT 9
For example: "Kiyosato, Kobuchizawa, and Nirasaki Area" the main reasoning for the comma here is that someone who is unfamiliar with the area could potentially read the following sentence (without the comma) in three ways: "Kiyosato, Kobuchizawa and Nirasaki Area"1) there are three different areas: Kiyosato | Kobuchizawa | Nirasaki 2) there are 2 different areas: Kiyosato | Kobuchizawa and Nirasaki 3) there is one area: the Kiyosato, Kobuchizawa, and Nirasaki Area not knowing myself which it is, i can't say whether the comma is necessary. however, assuming that the singular of "Area" is intentional, then it suggests that the Area is one larger region, made up of three smaller areas: the Kiyosato Area, the Kobuchizawa Area and the Nirasaki Area. in that bolded sentence i just wrote, as i'm clearly making the distinction that there are three separate areas, the oxford comma at the end is unnecessary. however, in your example sentence, it's unclear (unless there's more to the sentence that would otherwise make it clear) what the area is comprised of. Thanks g-rex ^^ It is indeed a larger area made up of 3 smaller areas. I will leave the oxford comma where it is then ^^ In the case of 2 areas, I will go ahead and erase the comma since it is not necessary. Thank you very much for your help. Naboo
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Post by wheelix on May 22, 2015 17:41:41 GMT 9
Greetings all! We have a new 'attraction' in our city which contains much vaunted 茶の湯体験施設. The 施設 consist of a number of nice 茶室 where you can try tea ceremony for yourself. That has been translated as 'Tea Ceremony Experience Facility'. Which as a phrase hardly fills me with joy and wonder. I don't mind the first bit but the word 'facility' is so completely devoid of 魅力 it's painful.
Anyone have any suggestions for things I could put in instead of facility?
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Post by snell_mouse on May 25, 2015 9:03:20 GMT 9
Maybe you could just do something like Tea Ceremony Center?
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Post by Aya Raincoat on May 26, 2015 11:24:17 GMT 9
Or you can just use "The Tea Ceremony Experience". Sounds like a 3D movie on IMAX!
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Post by snell_mouse on May 26, 2015 13:46:38 GMT 9
Okay so I know in English we don't use 'menu' to describe the services offered at hair salons (right?), but what do we call them instead? Service lists?
Context: in order to be a 'Muslim Beauty' salon, they have to offer an English (menu?)
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G-Rex
Dead Stargod
killed SAKAMOTO LYOMA with crappa sushi
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Posts: 7,198
CIR Experience: Former CIR
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Post by G-Rex on May 26, 2015 13:59:41 GMT 9
or just have something like Plans/Courses A B C
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G-Rex
Dead Stargod
killed SAKAMOTO LYOMA with crappa sushi
hi
Posts: 7,198
CIR Experience: Former CIR
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Post by G-Rex on May 26, 2015 13:59:54 GMT 9
too simple?
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keio chris
Dead Stargod
ever looked a star dragon in the eyes?
Posts: 3,043
CIR Experience: Former CIR
Location: Tokyo
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Post by keio chris on May 26, 2015 13:59:54 GMT 9
Okay so I know in English we don't use 'menu' to describe the services offered at hair salons (right?), but what do we call them instead? Service lists? Context: in order to be a 'Muslim Beauty' salon, they have to offer an English (menu?) I'll never get how CIRs wind up doing this kind of stuff. Our office is super anal about not doing things for MINKAN. Regarding "menus", I am I right in thinking this is a like a set course? E.g. pay 7000 yen for a wash, hair cut and blow dry?
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Post by snell_mouse on May 26, 2015 14:03:15 GMT 9
Nah the context is literally in the sentence about 条件 to be considered one of these salons so it's not a specific list of what they are. Dandy it's because I think the tourism division is trying to market the salons to tourists.
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Post by hinats on May 26, 2015 14:33:10 GMT 9
Okay so I know in English we don't use 'menu' to describe the services offered at hair salons (right?), but what do we call them instead? Service lists? Context: in order to be a 'Muslim Beauty' salon, they have to offer an English (menu?) My first instinct is "list of services" bc I feel like that's what I see most often, but I may be misunderstanding the context? On a note brought up previously, I have found that I struggle a lot with how to translate 施設 in general. "Facility" only really works in certain contexts in English, but my brain is very 鈍い and I can never seem to come up with better options. I liked the suggestion of "center" for the tea thing, but that doesn't always describe things that are dubbed 施設 in Japanese, either. Does anyone else have any experience with this? Can someone surgically implant a bunch of different options for 施設 in my head so I don't have to worry about it anymore?
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Post by hinats on May 26, 2015 14:51:16 GMT 9
(double-post because I am horrible)
Also, I got asked to check for spelling/punctuation errors in the tagline for my city's big summer festival:
天に捧ぐ I Dedicate to Heaven
haahhh. Obviously that is a ridiculous google translate tagline (that they want to, like, put on shirts and official merch and junk) but I was having a ton of trouble coming up with a good way to make it sound less awful while keeping it close to the original. I asked for more context, like exactly what and how are you 捧ぐing, and they explained that it's referring to burning giant horse figures (made out of straw, paper, etc.) as a way to console the spirits of all the horses who gave their lives to the rice field expansion that the 江戸幕府 promoted in the 17th-18th century.
What I came up with in the end:
"A dedication to the heavens"
Which is still kind of clunky, but is pretty close to the original.
I suggested they choose a different English tagline that sounds cooler, maybe something that explicitly mentions fire or horses or spirits or some combination thereof. I came up with:
"Spirits alight" (as in, people are in high spirits during this festival, the horse figures are alight (ablaze) and also the spirits of the horses are alighting onto the heavenly plane? haha)
or, slightly less pun-y but also sort of silly: "Red-hot spirit"
What do you guys think?
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keio chris
Dead Stargod
ever looked a star dragon in the eyes?
Posts: 3,043
CIR Experience: Former CIR
Location: Tokyo
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Post by keio chris on May 26, 2015 15:07:15 GMT 9
"Spirits alight" (as in, people are in high spirits during this festival, the horse figures are alight (ablaze) and also the spirits of the horses are alighting onto the heavenly plane? haha) This sounds like an announcement that would play on the train in Spirited Away. I saw this festival once too, it was creepy as heck, those weird dances before they burn stuff. Sounds ok to me though.
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Post by snell_mouse on May 26, 2015 15:07:27 GMT 9
Hmm my default for 施設 is also facility. Sometimes maybe institution is okay?
I like 'a dedication to the heavens' even though it's a bit clunky.
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Post by hinats on May 26, 2015 15:13:33 GMT 9
"Spirits alight" (as in, people are in high spirits during this festival, the horse figures are alight (ablaze) and also the spirits of the horses are alighting onto the heavenly plane? haha) This sounds like an announcement that would play on the train in Spirited Away. I saw this festival once too, it was creepy as heck, those weird dances before they burn stuff. Sounds ok to me though. Yeah, I struggled with that because alight is really only used for birds/disembarking from a train/plane/boat but I just couldn't resist the double meaning snell_mouse yeah "institution" is also sometimes OK, but to me it trends toward the dreary and ominous, in much the same way that facility often sounds sterile and metallic. I recently struggled with it when translating a document about 保育園(所)・幼稚園・認定こども園 which used 施設 all willy-nilly. Everything I came up with wasn't working for me: center (too vague), school (they aren't really schools and the whole point is that some are more school like and some are focused on 保育), facility & institution (for the reasons listed above)
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Post by snell_mouse on May 26, 2015 15:15:11 GMT 9
Oh but I feel like daycare/childcare facilities sounds perfectly normal to me. Perhaps it's because I also can't think of any other good alternative, haha.
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Post by hinats on May 26, 2015 15:23:37 GMT 9
HAH you're right! when you say the whole thing, daycare/childcare facilities, it sounds totally natural. When I was just subbing in facility for 施設 it just didn't sit right with me for some reason...
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Post by snell_mouse on May 28, 2015 10:11:53 GMT 9
Is there a cooler/more official way to say お礼 (as in ○○イベントお礼 as the title before a message) than 'Thank-You Message' or 'Message of Thanks'?
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Post by jitenshaa on May 28, 2015 10:20:25 GMT 9
Is there a cooler/more official way to say お礼 (as in ○○イベントお礼 as the title before a message) than 'Thank-You Message' or 'Message of Thanks'? Message of Gratitude or Appreciation?
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Post by snell_mouse on May 28, 2015 10:23:05 GMT 9
Hmm I thought about those as well but gratitude seems a little too modest, if that makes sense, and appreciation just sounds kind of different since it is a message thanking people for their understanding/cooperation. But they are a bit more formal than 'thanks' so...> _ <
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