Nurkiras
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Post by Nurkiras on Jun 18, 2018 14:42:53 GMT 9
...and of COURSE the final line is more wankery about things dancing in ephemeral breezes. The curse of the Airborne Geezer continues
sorry but i kind of hate this story hue
maybe it will grow on me though. there were some really nice lines
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Post by shanshan310 on Jun 18, 2018 14:54:55 GMT 9
I'm gonna give it another go this year and try not to fail miserably hue especially if it's looking like I might have to try and hustle for freelance in the near future, as I plan to move back to the UK with no job lined up
Hopefully the writing thread and forum dnd has polished my prose a little...and I guess I'll write in American English to be on the safe side hue
Don't do it! That's how America wins  stay vigilant. I accidentally said aluminum the other day and I hate myself End of september? That actually might be doable! |
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Post by ❄icepath❄ on Jun 22, 2018 15:28:39 GMT 9
of course there's a thread for this... *jumps into the bandwagon... by downloading the pdf and opening a blank word doc*
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Post by Honey on Jul 11, 2018 9:29:15 GMT 9
Oh maybe I'll try this this year!
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Mumblesnore
Dead Stargod
’Tis the season (for Eggnog)
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Post by Mumblesnore on Jul 11, 2018 9:55:30 GMT 9
OMG I missed this!
I will definitely try to submit this year hue
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Mumblesnore
Dead Stargod
’Tis the season (for Eggnog)
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Location: Tokyo
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Post by Mumblesnore on Jul 11, 2018 10:10:55 GMT 9
Wait I'm confused haha.
If they don't want us to indent paragraphs OR separate them with blank lines every time what are we supposed to do????
Also lowkey I'm not a fan of the person who wrote this hue. They sound persnickety.
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Nurkiras
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Post by Nurkiras on Jul 11, 2018 10:23:00 GMT 9
i typed the whole story up so I could have something besides a PDF to work with
Also this made me go slow and really read/ understand the story
I still don't like it but I feel more confident now at least hue
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Mumblesnore
Dead Stargod
’Tis the season (for Eggnog)
Posts: 16,154
CIR Experience: Former CIR
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Post by Mumblesnore on Jul 11, 2018 10:25:23 GMT 9
The first sentence is quite a doozy.
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Post by Ividia on Jul 11, 2018 10:43:55 GMT 9
i am ignoring it until after I move haha
it means I won't get the full time to polish it perhaps, but I'll also be at home and unemployed for a month and a half before the deadline so I think I'll have plenty of time on balance and something to do
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Post by Psychic Pug on Jul 11, 2018 10:45:43 GMT 9
I have changed my mind and will join the suffering contest.
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Post by ❄icepath❄ on Jul 11, 2018 10:50:24 GMT 9
hue I'm so bored at work I've finished translating + editing it + got it proofread... Just waiting for the right time to send it in.
But I can see why they don't want indents, because for some reason one paragraph is really only one or two lines long, and indenting every paragraph will look stupid too. I wonder if I should use the paragraph formatting to put a space after every line without pressing enter after every line.
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Mumblesnore
Dead Stargod
’Tis the season (for Eggnog)
Posts: 16,154
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Location: Tokyo
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Post by Mumblesnore on Jul 11, 2018 10:54:15 GMT 9
I'm still confused.
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Post by ❄icepath❄ on Jul 11, 2018 11:12:21 GMT 9
it'll be like this post, if i manage to make a post this long
everything will start on an indent, but the paragraphs are barely
long enough to fill up more than two lines.
and that can't really be helped because the author writes like
this.
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Mumblesnore
Dead Stargod
’Tis the season (for Eggnog)
Posts: 16,154
CIR Experience: Former CIR
Location: Tokyo
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Post by Mumblesnore on Jul 11, 2018 11:18:57 GMT 9
But if you're not supposed to indent paragraphs or separate them with blank spaces won't they all run together?
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Post by ❄icepath❄ on Jul 11, 2018 11:30:44 GMT 9
yes hahaha and i can tell you now that it looks really bad, but that's what they want =/ go figure.
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Mumblesnore
Dead Stargod
’Tis the season (for Eggnog)
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Post by Mumblesnore on Jul 11, 2018 11:32:54 GMT 9
In other news I just read the full story and I really like it!
I prefer atmospheric and enigmatic stuff like this to more straightforward feel-goody stuff like Flying Gramps.
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Post by ❄icepath❄ on Jul 11, 2018 11:38:05 GMT 9
hehhhhh... i finished translating it and i still don't like it haha... i like the subject matter but not the style
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Mumblesnore
Dead Stargod
’Tis the season (for Eggnog)
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Post by Mumblesnore on Jul 11, 2018 11:40:11 GMT 9
:o
Ten people, ten colors of parasols ne
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Nurkiras
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Post by Nurkiras on Jul 11, 2018 11:47:18 GMT 9
yeah the writing style drives me insane
like we get it
you know kanji
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Post by ❄icepath❄ on Jul 11, 2018 11:51:32 GMT 9
the biggest problem i have with it are the dialogues, and how it's so difficult to tell who is saying what.
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Nurkiras
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Post by Nurkiras on Jul 11, 2018 11:55:32 GMT 9
going back and slowly dissecting it/ copying it really helped with that. Plus now I have a google-able version
the amount of wank in the first sentence is impressive, honestly.
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Post by ❄icepath❄ on Jul 11, 2018 11:58:00 GMT 9
i had to print it out and take color pencils to it (coz i have no highlighters with me) and color-code the dialogues...
though i feel like the way someone translates the first line sentence paragraph would tell you a lot about the translator haha
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Mumblesnore
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’Tis the season (for Eggnog)
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Post by Mumblesnore on Jul 11, 2018 11:58:41 GMT 9
I don't think the first sentence is wanky, just long. I'm not sure it's possible to keep it as one sentence in English, and you might have to split it up.
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Nurkiras
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Post by Nurkiras on Jul 11, 2018 12:00:25 GMT 9
"The umbrellas were pretty. So was the water and trees. Naomi painted good. The Parasol colors were nice." |
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Post by ❄icepath❄ on Jul 11, 2018 12:01:42 GMT 9
long sentences are so characteristic of Japanese writing tho
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Nurkiras
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Post by Nurkiras on Jul 11, 2018 12:25:00 GMT 9
A run-on sentence full of fancy, fragmented descriptions of nature sounds like The Japanese sentence
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Mumblesnore
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Post by Mumblesnore on Jul 11, 2018 13:16:45 GMT 9
It kind of reminds me of a Japanese-style Virginia Woolfe a bit.
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Post by ❄icepath❄ on Jul 11, 2018 13:28:34 GMT 9
I would agree, but alas I've never read any Virginia Woolfe. English Lit is generally not my cup of tea.
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Mumblesnore
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’Tis the season (for Eggnog)
Posts: 16,154
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Post by Mumblesnore on Jul 11, 2018 13:54:16 GMT 9
I just translated a page instead of working on my actual HONYAK ILAI in about 30 minutes and that's farther than I ever got with Flying Pappy hue.
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Mumblesnore
Dead Stargod
’Tis the season (for Eggnog)
Posts: 16,154
CIR Experience: Former CIR
Location: Tokyo
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Post by Mumblesnore on Jul 11, 2018 14:07:31 GMT 9
Ugh I want to call everyone Mr. Orange, Mr. Mint, Mr. Lemon etc. (because it reminds me of Reservoir Dogs) but I guess we don't know for sure all the people in question are men...
Is everyone just calling them by the colors, without titles?
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stay vigilant. 
