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Post by Aya Raincoat on Oct 25, 2019 15:00:01 GMT 9
I already showed this to a couple people, but it's screwing with my brain so I'm currently translating information about childcare certification (i.e. parents getting certification for free childcare etc.) and the validity period of the certifications. For people certified due to the mother of the child being pregnant, the validation period is: 出産予定日月の2ヵ月前の月の初日から出産予定日から起算して８週を経過する日の翌日が属する月の末月 Which Google translates as: "The last day of the month to which the next day of the 8th week has passed since the first day of the month two months before the scheduled month" And which, following me and English interpreter lady trying to work it out, I have translated as: (The validity period is) "From the first day of the month two months before the due date (of the baby), to the last day of the month in which the day after the date 8 weeks from the due date falls". But it's still so wordy and confusing. Are there any ways to reword this to make it clearer, but obviously keep the precise time scale? I feel like it's the 'day after the date 8 weeks from the due date' that's screwing everything up, but that's what's specified so there're only so many ways I can say it. Wow, that second part... I don't know how much room you have, but what about changing the format: From: The first day of the month, two months prior to the due date To: The last day of the month, 8 weeks plus one day after the due date
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Post by 🍅™️ on Oct 25, 2019 15:01:25 GMT 9
HI HELLO YES I AM (and have before) DOING A HANDBOOK FOR CHILDCARE FACILITIES NOW AND HAVE ENCOUNTERED THAT SAME SENTENCE.
yeah I haven't found much luck making it less wordy. the only thing I have tried to do to make it less painful or less easy to get lost reading is to bold/underline certain parts for emphasis.
(also I'm not necessarily sure how perfect changing "in which" with "that" is, but it makes it a little shorter)
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Post by 𝑜𝓇𝒾𝒽𝒾𝓂𝑒 on Oct 25, 2019 15:10:04 GMT 9
Aya Raincoat That could work I guess, but we have to specify that it's the last day of the month in which the day after the day 8 weeks from due date is, not the month that the day exactly 8 weeks after falls in (i.e. if the day 8 weeks after the due date is 30th April, the day after that would be 1st May, making the 'to' date the 31st May, not 30th April) so I feel like wording it like in your example could be confusing ^^;;; 🍅™️ OMG SOMEONE WHO SHARES MY PAIN. Most of the translations I have to do are for the Childcare department TTwTT I like the idea of bolding certain parts, I do feel like that helps make it easier to read Thank you! <3
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Post by Aya Raincoat on Oct 25, 2019 15:12:20 GMT 9
Ah, sorry, I thought the "plus one day" was clear ^^;
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Post by 🍅™️ on Oct 25, 2019 15:16:09 GMT 9
Aya Raincoat That could work I guess, but we have to specify that it's the last day of the month in which the day after the day 8 weeks from due date is, not the month that the day exactly 8 weeks after falls in (i.e. if the day 8 weeks after the due date is 30th April, the day after that would be 1st May, making the 'to' date the 31st May, not 30th April) so I feel like wording it like in your example could be confusing ^^;;; 🍅™️ OMG SOMEONE WHO SHARES MY PAIN. Most of the translations I have to do are for the Childcare department TTwTT I like the idea of bolding certain parts, I do feel like that helps make it easier to read Thank you! <3 no I do sooooooo much translation and interpretation for them too
and before I had a steady flow of work, I started working on translation our 散歩/childraising guidebook here for something to do (it's not a requested translation, it's just something that if I ever finish, that'd be really helpful)
yeah I'm currently translating our 保育所（等） 利用申込みのてびき so I understand soooo much
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Post by kiseki on Oct 25, 2019 15:21:04 GMT 9
Aya Raincoat That could work I guess, but we have to specify that it's the last day of the month in which the day after the day 8 weeks from due date is, not the month that the day exactly 8 weeks after falls in (i.e. if the day 8 weeks after the due date is 30th April, the day after that would be 1st May, making the 'to' date the 31st May, not 30th April) so I feel like wording it like in your example could be confusing ^^;;; 🍅™️ OMG SOMEONE WHO SHARES MY PAIN. Most of the translations I have to do are for the Childcare department TTwTT I like the idea of bolding certain parts, I do feel like that helps make it easier to read Thank you! <3 Okay so I’ve had to translate a 児童手当 thing but it wasn’t this annoying wtf? For us, it was just report everything within 15 days But to see if I understand what this is saying here’s an example: Due date: June 1st Validity period starts two months before that so: April 1st Validity period ends on the last day of the month in which the day after the day that is 8 weeks from the due date falls: so 8 weeks is two months, so in this example 8 weeks after the due date is roughly August 1st. So it ends at the end of August. Did I understand that right? |
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Post by 𝑜𝓇𝒾𝒽𝒾𝓂𝑒 on Oct 25, 2019 15:21:55 GMT 9
Aya Raincoat That could work I guess, but we have to specify that it's the last day of the month in which the day after the day 8 weeks from due date is, not the month that the day exactly 8 weeks after falls in (i.e. if the day 8 weeks after the due date is 30th April, the day after that would be 1st May, making the 'to' date the 31st May, not 30th April) so I feel like wording it like in your example could be confusing ^^;;; 🍅™️ OMG SOMEONE WHO SHARES MY PAIN. Most of the translations I have to do are for the Childcare department TTwTT I like the idea of bolding certain parts, I do feel like that helps make it easier to read Thank you! <3 no I do sooooooo much translation and interpretation for them too
and before I had a steady flow of work, I started working on translation our 散歩/childraising guidebook here for something to do (it's not a requested translation, it's just something that if I ever finish, that'd be really helpful)
yeah I'm currently translating our 保育所（等） 利用申込みのてびき so I understand soooo much
Omg yes, it's partly only because I went to their department asking if they had stuff they wanted translated (when I also didn't have steady work) that they give us all this stuff TwT
Awh, yes, two of my current ones are entitled:
令和元年度施設利用給付認定について (the one this phrase was from) and
施設等利用きゅふ認定申請書
So I feel like we really are translating the same kinda thing if not the same thing XD
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Post by 𝑜𝓇𝒾𝒽𝒾𝓂𝑒 on Oct 25, 2019 15:24:48 GMT 9
Aya Raincoat That could work I guess, but we have to specify that it's the last day of the month in which the day after the day 8 weeks from due date is, not the month that the day exactly 8 weeks after falls in (i.e. if the day 8 weeks after the due date is 30th April, the day after that would be 1st May, making the 'to' date the 31st May, not 30th April) so I feel like wording it like in your example could be confusing ^^;;; 🍅™️ OMG SOMEONE WHO SHARES MY PAIN. Most of the translations I have to do are for the Childcare department TTwTT I like the idea of bolding certain parts, I do feel like that helps make it easier to read Thank you! <3 Okay so I’ve had to translate a 児童手当 thing but it wasn’t this annoying wtf? For us, it was just report everything within 15 days But to see if I understand what this is saying here’s an example: Due date: June 1st Validity period starts two months before that so: April 1st Validity period ends on the last day of the month in which the day after the day that is 8 weeks from the due date falls: so 8 weeks is two months, so in this example 8 weeks after the due date is roughly August 1st. So it ends at the end of August. Did I understand that right? Ikr?!
Ah, but they say 8 weeks not 2 months, so I'm pretty sure they want it that precise. For example, if we use this year, 8 weeks after Sat 1st June is actually Sat 27th July. So the day after the day 8 weeks from the due date would be Sun 28th July, making the end of the validity period for this case actually 31st July ^^;;
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Post by kiseki on Oct 25, 2019 15:32:58 GMT 9
Okay so I’ve had to translate a 児童手当 thing but it wasn’t this annoying wtf? For us, it was just report everything within 15 days But to see if I understand what this is saying here’s an example: Due date: June 1st Validity period starts two months before that so: April 1st Validity period ends on the last day of the month in which the day after the day that is 8 weeks from the due date falls: so 8 weeks is two months, so in this example 8 weeks after the due date is roughly August 1st. So it ends at the end of August. Did I understand that right? Ikr?!
Ah, but they say 8 weeks not 2 months, so I'm pretty sure they want it that precise. For example, if we use this year, 8 weeks after Sat 1st June is actually Sat 27th July. So the day after the day 8 weeks from the due date would be Sun 28th July, making the end of the validity period for this case actually 31st July ^^;;
Okay, I see preciseness is important Lord almighty this is a pain in the ass xD It would’ve been so much easier if they said that the validity date starts two months before the due date and ends two months after the due date just to make the wording simple. None of this “...to the day after the date that is 8 weeks from the due date.” Who thought it was a good idea to make important shit like this confusing. I want to SMACKDOWN these people. |
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Post by 𝑜𝓇𝒾𝒽𝒾𝓂𝑒 on Oct 25, 2019 15:35:53 GMT 9
Ikr?!
Ah, but they say 8 weeks not 2 months, so I'm pretty sure they want it that precise. For example, if we use this year, 8 weeks after Sat 1st June is actually Sat 27th July. So the day after the day 8 weeks from the due date would be Sun 28th July, making the end of the validity period for this case actually 31st July ^^;;
Okay, I see preciseness is important Lord almighty this is a pain in the ass xD It would’ve been so much easier if they said that the validity date starts two months before the due date and ends two months after the due date just to make the wording simple. None of this “...to the day after the date that is 8 weeks from the due date.” Who thought it was a good idea to make important shit like this confusing. I want to SMACKDOWN these people. YES, I thought that too! Just make it a round figure, sheesh o,o
Haha, please be my guest
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Post by kiseki on Oct 25, 2019 15:38:55 GMT 9
Okay, I see preciseness is important Lord almighty this is a pain in the ass xD It would’ve been so much easier if they said that the validity date starts two months before the due date and ends two months after the due date just to make the wording simple. None of this “...to the day after the date that is 8 weeks from the due date.” Who thought it was a good idea to make important shit like this confusing. I want to SMACKDOWN these people. YES, I thought that too! Just make it a round figure, sheesh o,o
Haha, please be my guest
I guess what you have now is probably as good as it’s gonna get? Like, if you read it you’d be able to understand it but it just takes a bit of thinking to get it. I feel bad for non-native English speakers who need it tho, especially if they only use English because they’re better at it than Japanese but not by much. |
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Post by 𝑜𝓇𝒾𝒽𝒾𝓂𝑒 on Oct 25, 2019 15:52:29 GMT 9
YES, I thought that too! Just make it a round figure, sheesh o,o
Haha, please be my guest
I guess what you have now is probably as good as it’s gonna get? Like, if you read it you’d be able to understand it but it just takes a bit of thinking to get it. I feel bad for non-native English speakers who need it tho, especially if they only use English because they’re better at it than Japanese but not by much. Yeah =/ Yeah, we actually have a lot of people like that here because of all the international students at uni-in-the-mountains, the majority of them are from other countries in Asia or the Middle East so a significant amount of them are not super fluent in English or Japanese =/
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Post by Leilo on Oct 28, 2019 9:42:30 GMT 9
I'm trying to write about this local mochi in my town in a way that doesn't sound gross/weird in English. It's mochi filled with a liquid mixture of brown sugar, miso, and walnut inside. It's similar to a soup dumpling in that when you bite into it you need be careful to slurp/suck in or else the juices will squirt all over the place. So I basically I want to say that in a way that actually sounds appetizing? Like I could say the insides of the mochi are "liquid" or "sauce"...mixture? Gooey?? It doesn't feel right to call the insides soup or juice though. I'm also writing to be careful when you eat it but it doesn't sound very nice to just say "if you simply bite into it the juices will end up all over you!" orz. if anyone wants to see what the mochi looks like |
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Post by leinyann on Oct 28, 2019 10:04:38 GMT 9
I'm trying to write about this local mochi in my town in a way that doesn't sound gross/weird in English. It's mochi filled with a liquid mixture of brown sugar, miso, and walnut inside. It's similar to a soup dumpling in that when you bite into it you need be careful to slurp/suck in or else the juices will squirt all over the place. So I basically I want to say that in a way that actually sounds appetizing? Like I could say the insides of the mochi are "liquid" or "sauce"...mixture? Gooey?? It doesn't feel right to call the insides soup or juice though. I'm also writing to be careful when you eat it but it doesn't sound very nice to just say "if you simply bite into it the juices will end up all over you!" orz. if anyone wants to see what the mochi looks like Don't know if this would be much help but I thought of maybe "syrupy" for "liquid/sauce"? Not too sure what would be good for the caution part though... >< |
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Post by Ham on Oct 28, 2019 10:08:27 GMT 9
Leilo If you're just writing and not constrained by having a Japanese version to follow, maybe sumfink like: "Part of the dish's appeal is the syrupy walnut-miso filling that comes spilling out when you bite into it. But take care when you do, or else you might find yourself covered in a sticky mess!"
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Post by Leilo on Oct 28, 2019 13:57:29 GMT 9
Leilo If you're just writing and not constrained by having a Japanese version to follow, maybe sumfink like: "Part of the dish's appeal is the syrupy walnut-miso filling that comes spilling out when you bite into it. But take care when you do, or else you might find yourself covered in a sticky mess!" Oh, that sounds good. Thanks! |
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Post by Deleted on Nov 7, 2019 10:36:22 GMT 9
This is my first attempt at using an em-dash:
The ***** City Cultural Association (***** Branch) held the “***** Gathering of Performing Arts”--an event where ****-cho cultural and performing-arts organizations dance, sing, etc. in front of a crowd--at the **** Regional Community Center on August 25th.
Please critiquing
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Post by Aya Raincoat on Nov 7, 2019 10:48:31 GMT 9
This is my first attempt at using an em-dash: The ***** City Cultural Association (***** Branch) held the “***** Gathering of Performing Arts”--an event where ****-cho cultural and performing-arts organizations dance, sing, etc. in front of a crowd--at the **** Regional Community Center on August 25th. Please critiquing I would change your list to simply "performed" and take out the crowd part, but the dashes are fine. |
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Post by 𝑜𝓇𝒾𝒽𝒾𝓂𝑒 on Nov 7, 2019 13:43:36 GMT 9
This is my first attempt at using an em-dash: The ***** City Cultural Association (***** Branch) held the “***** Gathering of Performing Arts”--an event where ****-cho cultural and performing-arts organizations dance, sing, etc. in front of a crowd--at the **** Regional Community Center on August 25th. Please critiquing I would change your list to simply "performed" and take out the crowd part, but the dashes are fine. Mightn't that make the sentence a little 'perform' heavy though, particularly with the second two instances being quite close together?
"The ~~City Cultural Association (~~~Branch) held the "~~ Gathering of Performing Arts"--an event where ~~-cho cultural and performing-arts organizations performed at the ~~ Regional Community Center on August 25th"
I mean I don't have any better suggestions, but ^^;;;
Also, are those dashes supposed to be without spaces either side? I feel like it'd look clearer with the spaces but I don't use em-dashes so I'm not sure of the protocol ^^;;;
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Post by Aya Raincoat on Nov 7, 2019 13:57:26 GMT 9
I would change your list to simply "performed" and take out the crowd part, but the dashes are fine. Mightn't that make the sentence a little 'perform' heavy though, particularly with the second two instances being quite close together?
"The ~~City Cultural Association (~~~Branch) held the "~~ Gathering of Performing Arts"--an event where ~~-cho cultural and performing-arts organizations performed at the ~~ Regional Community Center on August 25th"
I mean I don't have any better suggestions, but ^^;;;
Also, are those dashes supposed to be without spaces either side? I feel like it'd look clearer with the spaces but I don't use em-dashes so I'm not sure of the protocol ^^;;;
Aaah, you're right. There's too many squiggles, so my eyes glazed over the rest of the sentence ^^;; But at the same time, I do not like that "etc." As for spacing, though, em dashes do not have them.
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Post by Aya Raincoat on Nov 7, 2019 14:01:58 GMT 9
Ok, how about:
On August 25, the City Cultural Association (X Branch) held the Y Gathering of Performing Arts, during which Z-cho organizations performed at the Regional Community Centre. ?
Like it's clear it's performing arts, so I'd take out the organizations one instead of the verb one.
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Post by 𝑜𝓇𝒾𝒽𝒾𝓂𝑒 on Nov 7, 2019 14:05:30 GMT 9
Mightn't that make the sentence a little 'perform' heavy though, particularly with the second two instances being quite close together?
"The ~~City Cultural Association (~~~Branch) held the "~~ Gathering of Performing Arts"--an event where ~~-cho cultural and performing-arts organizations performed at the ~~ Regional Community Center on August 25th"
I mean I don't have any better suggestions, but ^^;;;
Also, are those dashes supposed to be without spaces either side? I feel like it'd look clearer with the spaces but I don't use em-dashes so I'm not sure of the protocol ^^;;;
Aaah, you're right. There's too many squiggles, so my eyes glazed over the rest of the sentence ^^;; But at the same time, I do not like that "etc." As for spacing, though, em dashes do not have them.
Ah no worries ^^ Yeah I feel the same about the 'etc.' tbh Oh, NARUHODO!
Hm, it changes the order a lot, but what about
"The ~~City Cultural Association (~~~Branch) held the "~~ Gathering of Performing Arts" on August 25th. This event was held at ~~ Regional Community Center and involved singing, dancing, and other performances by cultural and performing-arts organizations from ~~cho".
(or)
"The ~~City Cultural Association (~~~Branch) held the "~~ Gathering of Performing Arts" on August 25th. This event was held at ~~ Regional Community Center and involved singing, dancing, and other performances by various organizations from ~~cho".
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Post by Aya Raincoat on Nov 7, 2019 14:23:21 GMT 9
Aaah, you're right. There's too many squiggles, so my eyes glazed over the rest of the sentence ^^;; But at the same time, I do not like that "etc." As for spacing, though, em dashes do not have them.
Ah no worries ^^ Yeah I feel the same about the 'etc.' tbh Oh, NARUHODO!
Hm, it changes the order a lot, but what about
"The ~~City Cultural Association (~~~Branch) held the "~~ Gathering of Performing Arts" on August 25th. This event was held at ~~ Regional Community Center and involved singing, dancing, and other performances by cultural and performing-arts organizations from ~~cho".
(or)
"The ~~City Cultural Association (~~~Branch) held the "~~ Gathering of Performing Arts" on August 25th. This event was held at ~~ Regional Community Center and involved singing, dancing, and other performances by various organizations from ~~cho".
Yeah, without the Japanese, it's hard to think of the order, so I didn't realize it mattered that much ^^;;
I like the second one better! If I were to edit it, I'd say:
"The ~~City Cultural Association (~~~Branch) held the "~~ Gathering of Performing Arts" (I don't know what the deal is with Japanese and having quotation marks around names, but it looks weird in English) on August 25th. The (I always find "this" unnecessary in contexts like these) event took place (repetition) at ~~ Regional Community Center and involved singing, dancing, and other performances by various organizations from ~~cho".
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Post by 𝑜𝓇𝒾𝒽𝒾𝓂𝑒 on Nov 7, 2019 14:27:26 GMT 9
Ah no worries ^^ Yeah I feel the same about the 'etc.' tbh Oh, NARUHODO!
Hm, it changes the order a lot, but what about
"The ~~City Cultural Association (~~~Branch) held the "~~ Gathering of Performing Arts" on August 25th. This event was held at ~~ Regional Community Center and involved singing, dancing, and other performances by cultural and performing-arts organizations from ~~cho".
(or)
"The ~~City Cultural Association (~~~Branch) held the "~~ Gathering of Performing Arts" on August 25th. This event was held at ~~ Regional Community Center and involved singing, dancing, and other performances by various organizations from ~~cho".
Yeah, without the Japanese, it's hard to think of the order, so I didn't realize it mattered that much ^^;;
I like the second one better! If I were to edit it, I'd say:
"The ~~City Cultural Association (~~~Branch) held the "~~ Gathering of Performing Arts" (I don't know what the deal is with Japanese and having quotation marks around names, but it looks weird in English) on August 25th. The (I always find "this" unnecessary in contexts like these) event took place (repetition) at ~~ Regional Community Center and involved singing, dancing, and other performances by various organizations from ~~cho".
Yeah, I'm all for reordering things to sound more natural in English as long as it still gets the meaning across ^^;
Sounds good! All very valid points, I agree with both of your corrections~
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Post by Deleted on Nov 7, 2019 14:34:32 GMT 9
I ended up going with this:
The  Branch of The City Cultural Association held the “ Gathering of Performing Arts”--an event where town's cultural and performing-arts organizations perform in front of a crowd by singing, dancing, etc.--at the Regional Community Center on August 25th.
Being hard on my own English has me feeling like
Why do Japanese sentences have to be so damn long and packed to the brim with information? |
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leximaha
Tried natto; not a fan
Posts: 59
CIR Experience: Former CIR
Location: Nagano
Gender (Pronouns): she/her/hers
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Post by leximaha on Nov 15, 2019 11:52:50 GMT 9
Hey all! I have a quick translation question! For 「表参道」, is it best to simply write out "Omotesando" rather than write out a clunky explanation like "a street leading up to a temple" especially when it's used in a title? For context, I'm translating a signboard titled 「表参道長野オリンピックメモリアルパーク」 I figured that 表参道 is seen widely enough throughout the country that there has to be precedence for a standardized translation. 39 in advance!  |
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Post by thelatter on Nov 15, 2019 11:55:42 GMT 9
Hey all! I have a quick translation question! For 「表参道」, is it best to simply write out "Omotesando" rather than write out a clunky explanation like "a street leading up to a temple" especially when it's used in a title? For context, I'm translating a signboard titled 「表参道長野オリンピックメモリアルパーク」 I figured that 表参道 is seen widely enough throughout the country that there has to be precedence for a standardized translation. 39 in advance! Is this a place name? If it is, I would keep it as Omotesando Nagano Olympic Memorial Park. In my experience, I've never heard any translation of "omotesando" outside of place names. |
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Post by Aya Raincoat on Nov 15, 2019 11:55:59 GMT 9
Hey all! I have a quick translation question! For 「表参道」, is it best to simply write out "Omotesando" rather than write out a clunky explanation like "a street leading up to a temple" especially when it's used in a title? For context, I'm translating a signboard titled 「表参道長野オリンピックメモリアルパーク」 I figured that 表参道 is seen widely enough throughout the country that there has to be precedence for a standardized translation. 39 in advance! Hmmmm... If I read just Omotesando, I would think of the area in Tokyo, so I wouldn't use it.... The other thing, too, is that since it's an obscure word anyway, you'd have to define it at least once. Unless it's an official place name, hue
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leximaha
Tried natto; not a fan
Posts: 59
CIR Experience: Former CIR
Location: Nagano
Gender (Pronouns): she/her/hers
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Post by leximaha on Nov 15, 2019 12:11:10 GMT 9
Is this a place name? If it is, I would keep it as Omotesando Nagano Olympic Memorial Park. In my experience, I've never heard any translation of "omotesando" outside of place names. It is a place name, there's a small Olympic Memorial Park on the main road leading up to Nagano's central temple, which is why the street/area is called Omotesando, which I've always seen described as a street leading up to a temple.
Aya Raincoat I do hesitate to throw in an explanation in the title itself, but maybe I can put one in later on in the signboard to clarify.
I think for the title I'll keep it "Omotesando" because it is the official name of the memorial park.
Many thanks!
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Post by Aya Raincoat on Nov 15, 2019 12:16:09 GMT 9
Is this a place name? If it is, I would keep it as Omotesando Nagano Olympic Memorial Park. In my experience, I've never heard any translation of "omotesando" outside of place names. It is a place name, there's a small Olympic Memorial Park on the main road leading up to Nagano's central temple, which is why the street/area is called Omotesando, which I've always seen described as a street leading up to a temple.
Aya Raincoat I do hesitate to throw in an explanation in the title itself, but maybe I can put one in later on in the signboard to clarify.
I think for the title I'll keep it "Omotesando" because it is the official name of the memorial park.
Many thanks!
Ah, if it's just the name, then I wouldn't put in an explanation! |
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Branch of The 
